Sunday, November 18, 2012

The Passing of a Friend  


Life: I had a completely different blog post planned for this evening, but a few hours earlier, I was informed that a good friend of mine passed away tonight.

I knew she had been sick for a while, but I didn't realize she was so close to death's door.

I had planned to visit earlier, but had found various reasons not to. Not enough money this week, not enough time that week. So on and so on.

The thought that she might pass away before I would see her again was certainly in the back of my mind, but I was essentially playing the odds that she would live long enough for my situation to be more agreeable towards making the trip.

She didn't.

I knew her for about eighteen years, and over the course of that time, we had worked together, shared many laughs, gone on trips, spent a lot of time talking… we were never best friends, but I certainly would've counted her as someone who meant something to me. She was one of those people who was always around, or in the background of pictures while never being the focus, but when absent, she was missed.

The last time I saw her we left on good terms, so I'm glad that there wasn't any unfinished business between us. Still, I'm sad that there was no "last time" before she died.

Her death today is a very real reminder of the fragility of life. Any of us can go at any time, and for practically any reason.

An undetected tumor for someone without health insurance. A drunk driver blowing through an intersection. Unchecked addiction for someone who says that they don't have a problem, eating a meal that shouldn't have had any peanuts, or trying to leave someone who refuses to let go... these things and a million others can lead to the untimely end of someone we care for.

Every minute we have is precious, and it's very rare that any of us knows exactly how many of them we have left. We forget sometimes, or choose to ignore it, but it’s a real and true thing.

Scary, perhaps. Unpleasant to be reminded of, but still… A real and true thing.

Spend time with people you care about. Talk to those who are far away. Don't put important things off until later, and take every opportunity you have to say "I love you" to those you do. Make the most of what you have, and be thankful for what you’ve got. 

You never know when you won’t have it anymore.


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2 comments: to “ The Passing of a Friend


    Sorry to read/hear this, Brad :( My heart out goes out to your friend's family, even though I didn't know her and I don't know them.


    I'm very sorry to hear about this. Just because someone's not a part of our day to day lives doesn't mean that they weren't important to us. Yet all too often, it seems that unless someone is part of that day-to-day life, they are just a bit easier to push back on, to visit 'later'.

    I have had similar thoughts where i just assumed there would be more time, there is always tomorrow - and so on, until you realize that in fact, there are no more opportunities.

    My sincere condolences.